This is another botched interview by James (though by no fault of his own). Vanessa of Revelation Records was kind enough to send the questions to Brandon and Brian, who were kind enough to answer them. If you have time, this is worth the read, as the questions are well thought out and entertaining to read.

1. Introduce yourself.

BRIAN: I'm Brian, aka B.H. Peligro/O'Hooligan and I am a drummer.

BRANDON: Brandon Welchez AKA your new boyfriend AKA god; vocals and intense sax work. it's also my responsibility to make the young ones cream their jeans.

2. Best way to dispose of ejaculation after masturbation?

BRANDON: Run your fingers through your hair.

3. Is there enough sex in music today?

BRIAN: There are those who would have you think that sex in music is coming back in a big way, but these are the same people who won't practice what they preach. All I'm saying is that if you are going to talk about how liberated you are and blah, blah, blah, you should back it up in your personal life. According to some kids on the net, my personal life is so fascinating that they have to write about it. Stop following people you don't even know around and go get a cock in your own mouth, please--for the love of Christ.

BRANDON: We ooze enough sexiness to compensate for any lack thereof in other bands.

4. Is it tough to get the crowd onstage to dance with you guys?

BRIAN: Sometimes, there isn't even a crowd to discuss let alone invite onstage. It's a good time when it does happen, but things get stomped on once you get to that point--expensive things too. It also pisses off a lot of clubs to do that sort of thing.

BRANDON: I don't really try. We give the audience back whatever they give us. That's why in some cities you will only hear people refer to us as assholes, while in others we are everybodies best friends. If people are cocks to us, we'll be be the snottiest bastards. When kids lighten up and have a good time, we do too and that's when the nudie fun starts. But I don't go out of my way to turn a crowd's mood around. If they want to be boring people, that's their tough shit.

5. Is there a fine line between art and music?

BRIAN: That's a toughie. I suppose it depends on how seriously you take your appreciation for either. I personally don't think that they are separated by much.

BRANDON: Music is an art. There is no line.

6. Are you excited about being on Revelation?

BRIAN: I still can't believe it. Kind of a shocker that anybody wants to put out our records, especially a label with that kind of history . . . wow.

BRANDON: We're having a great time getting friendly with the other Revelation bands. James Allen is our coach. Plus the money is GREAT. Revelation Records is the label that pays me. That was a snoop dogg reference. Figure it out.

7. Is this band something that you'd ever want to do full time?

BRIAN: I haven't had a "real" job since December 31st of last year. This is my full-time occupation and the dough is sweet, let me tell you. I'm going home in a couple of weeks (where I live with my mother) and probably try to sell some cds or musical equipment to get money. I'm livin' pretty large right now. This is all I want to do right now, so it's working out pretty good.

BRANDON: Of course. I'd be gone with these boys forever if I could. We're a gang. I wanna live and die with these boys.

8. Brian, Is your brother still in the Persian Gulf? Is it tough to keep in touch in him?

BRIAN: Nope. He came home safe after several months overseas. He is living back in the same city as I do and I get to see him regularly when I'm home. That all changes once his orders change (or he ships out again). It's very similar to going on tour in that respect. One month, you're sitting at home and comfortable; the next month, you're out to sea. It's a great way to see the world, so start a band (or join the Coast Guard if you play shitty music that nobody needs to hear).

9. Is it possible to be for the troops but against the cause? Explain.

BRIAN: This is super-close to home for me, growing up with both parents being Vietnam War veterans and a couple of siblings working for the military. Look at most people's situations who wind up fighting wars and you'll see that a large percentage have limited career options (or are led to believe so). Some people go into the military to go to college and others go because that's what they feel is their calling, I suppose. I am not a fan of war, but a huge problem with the anti-war movement in the 1960s (in my opinion) was the displacement of anger people felt. The problems begin much higher up than kids right out of high school joining the army. Black Sabbath's "War Pigs" sums that up pretty well I guess.

BRANDON: Yes. Most of the troops are just kids like you and me. The war is wrong and the majority of the kids that are over there fighting it would much rather be here enjoying their youth, I'm sure. Unfortunately, the way the world works is that poor young people from one country battle it out with poor young people from another and it's always for the interests of rich old people. But, yes, to answer your question, I'm against the war and for the troops.

10. Are you going to vote in this upcoming election?

BRIAN: I'm doing everything I possibly can to make that a reality.

BRANDON: Well, I sent out for my absentee ballot which was supposed to get to my aunt's house in New Jersey in time for me to pick it up. It didn't, so i'm going to try to have her send it out to me when she gets it. I'm trying very hard to vote.

11. Is it tough to keep up with what's going on in the presidential race while being on tour (debates, etc.)? Do you care if you're up to date or not?

BRIAN: Yeah, but the information is out there if you want it. There's no way I'm going to have it at my fingertips at all times as if I was at home, but at least I don't have to hear Bill O'Reilly's fat Irish head do its incessant gum-flapping. What a sizzle-chest that guy is. Bad comb-over too.

12. Name one album, besides your own, that you think all kids should own.

BRIAN: How about Iggy's Lust for Life, kids? It's pretty fucking genius and the drums sound amazing. Bowie is a sexy motherfucker and his production makes me cream in my socks.

BRANDON: I'm sure every kid already owns this album, but if not, this was definitely the first album that put me on the path to where I am now. Before I discovered this record, everything I listened to was either introduced to me by my parents or was the same crap on MTV that everybody else listened to. The album was "Nevermind the bollocks, here's the Sex Pistols", I was in 7th grade and my whole world changed after hearing it.

13. Final comments.

BRIAN: I used to have a comb-over myself, but I got hip to the premature baldness chic thing. Seriously, shiny foreheads are the new swept bangs.

BRANDON: The Plot to blow up the Eiffel Tower.

Interviewed by RF

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